Is Self-defeating Thinking Getting You Down?
Caregiver in Warren County VA
When someone else is relying on you for everything that they need, it can be a lot of pressure. And when you’re a family caregiver for an elderly loved one, you want the best for them. The problem
is that sometimes negative and self-defeating thinking can take you down so far that you burn yourself out. Here are some ways around those problems.
Perfectionist Thoughts
Perfectionism is a lovely ideal, but that’s exactly the problem with it: It’s an ideal. In reality, life is often nowhere near perfect. It’s messy and full of both good and bad. Dwelling on the imperfections keeps you in a negative mindset. Instead, focus on the fact that even bad situations change or end, and there is always a next time. Drop the expectation that you have to be perfect and you’ll find that you’re closer than you thought you ever were.
Ignoring the Positives
It only takes one situation going in a not so positive direction to make you feel as though everything you’re involved in is headed downhill. The problem is, that isn’t necessarily accurate. And when you beat yourself up and ignore what you do right, then you wind up thinking that you’re failing all the way around. If you’re having a hard time seeing the positives, then you should start journaling. Make it a point to list at least one accomplishment or positive note for each day. Before long, you’ll have a long list of positives to look back at any time you need a pick me up.
“Shoulding”
Drowning yourself in “should” statements does you far more harm than good. Should statements are any statement that you make to yourself about what you aren’t doing properly or aren’t doing at all. They pop up usually when you’re trying to motivate yourself to do something, like make that doctor’s appointment for yourself that you’ve been putting off or eating better. The big problem with these kinds of statements is that they don’t really motivate you. Instead, they make you feel worse than you did before. A better option is to remind yourself of the positive reasons to do something and phrase it in a way that removes the “should” completely.
Predicting the Future
There’s something to be said for letting the lamp of the past light the path of your future, but that isn’t always how things go. When you avoid doing something, either for yourself or for your loved one, because you already know how it’s going to end up, you might be cheating everyone involved out of what could have been a good experience. Try to be more accepting of new situations and new ideas and don’t overthink about what might happen.
Removing the self-defeating thoughts helps you to be there more fully for your elderly loved one.
If you or an aging loved one are considering hiring a professional caregiver in Warren County, VA, please contact the caring staff at LivinRite Home Care. Call Us Today at (703) 369-6677. Serving Northern Virginia, The Valley, and Surrounding Communities
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